8:00 A.M.
January 2nd, 2519
planet Persephone
John Casey and Bryce Larkin were both grumpy. Casey was grumpy because he was still feeling the after effects of an unfortunate amount of time in space, and Bryce was grumpy because Sarah had pulled rank on him and insisted that she drive.
And so she was driving, tear-assing through the streets of the city, weaving in and out of pedestrians, bicycles, and smaller vehicles. Bryce flinched every time they passed something, certain that some wayward piece of metal was going to scratch up his beloved Bandit Trans Am.
By the time they reached the central government office, Casey’s face had lost most of its color, and Bryce was holding on to the armrests with a white-knuckle grip. When the car came to a stop, they were both out of the car like a shot. Sarah exited the car like an oncoming storm and blasted toward the front of the government building.
Casey pulled Bryce aside and whispered, “Just between you and me… it’s gotta be that time of the month.”
“I don’t know,” Bryce whispered back, “I’ve never seen her this bad before.”
“I can hear you two assholes,” Sarah shouted.
“I’m just not gonna talk anymore,” Casey said to Bryce.
“Sounds like a plan.”
And so, four hours later, they had still found nothing, searching through the government databases, when an older librarian-looking woman approached them.
“Excuse me,” she said to Sarah, “did I hear that you were looking for information on a Charles Bartowski?”
“Yes,” she snapped, “and this search has been completely unsuccessful. This is almost worse than the Internet.”
“I’m very sorry,” the older woman said. “But I do know that there is – or at least, there used to be – an artifact at the Museum of Ancient History that was addressed to a Charles Bartowski.”
Sarah turned and looked at the older woman. “You’re kidding,” she said.
“Not at all. If you go over there, perhaps the curator can help you more with your search.”
“Thank you so much,” Sarah said. “Casey, Bryce, let’s go!”
As they got in the car, Sarah’s attitude seemed to have done a 180 from four hours before. “The letter survived!” she said, a smile spreading across her face. “And if it survived, it might have possibly found its way to Chuck!”
11:59 A.M.
January 2nd, 2519
transport Serenity
River pulled open the panel underneath the navigation computer. “All the wiring for the computer is down here,” she said.
Chuck slid under the panel. “Oh my God,” River heard him say from below. “This is a nightmare.”
“It’s an old ship that’s had a lot of field repairs,” she replied. “You have to assume that there’s going to be… well, challenges.”
“I thought you were a genius or something, though,” Chuck replied. “Can’t you fix this?”
“Being a genius does not mean that I can work with electrical wiring,” River replied with a hard edge to her voice. “And quite honestly, I take enough crap about the genius thing from the people who know me well.”
Chuck slid out from under the panel. “I’m sorry. I really am. I’m just not used to seeing wiring this… unfortunate, that’s all.”
“Will you be able to improve it, though?” River inquired.
“Oh, sure,” Chuck said. “This is what I do. I just need to go down to the cargo bay and get my tools and such out of the Herder.”
“The Herder?”
“Oh, sorry,” Chuck replied. “That’s what I call the red and white car that I crashed in here in. The company that I work for, Buy More, has on-call technical people called the ‘Nerd Herd’, and the car is a company car, which the store calls Herders.”
“I see. Well, I’ll stay here and fly the ship.”
On his way down to the cargo bay, Chuck passed by Zoe Washburne. She looked at him and practically giggled.
Chuck stopped. “What?” he asked. “You seem to find it funny that Kaylee and I are attracted to each other.”
“Oh, there’s nothing wrong with it,” Zoe said, snorting back laughter. “It’s just… you know, there is a 490 year age difference between the two of you.”
“Well, excuse me,” Chuck retorted indignantly. “I don’t know if you’ve ever experienced it, but when attraction happens between two people, a lot of things cease to matt…”
His voice trailed off as the smile left Zoe’s face, replaced by a cold expression. “Oh God,” Chuck said. “Wash… Washburne… he was your husband, wasn’t he?”
Zoe nodded, practically imperceptibly.
“Oh dear God,” Chuck moaned. “I’m an idiot. I am so sorry… I wish I had made that connection when it would’ve kept me from being an insensitive ass.”
Zoe sighed heavily. “Don’t worry about it, Chuck… you couldn’t have known… and it’s been over a year.”
“Are you sure?” Chuck asked worriedly. “I mean, I feel really bad now…”
“I’m sure,” Zoe said with a small smile. “It’s not your fault, but I forgive you anyway.”
“Alright,” Chuck said. He turned to head out of the mess, and as he reached the doorway…
“Now go get you some, boy!”
12:22 PM
January 2nd, 2519
Persephone Museum of Ancient History
“Ah, yes, the Bartowski Letter,” the curator wheezed. “I remember it came into the museum when I was just four years old, back in 2381.”
Sarah looked at Casey, and then back at the curator. “I’m sorry,” she said, “did you say you were four in 2381?”
“Yes,” the curator replied. “Why?”
“So that makes you 142 years old?” Casey asked.
“Yep, I’m an old man,” the curator said. “Most men only live to be about 120, 125.”
“Okay…” Sarah said. “Um, anyway. About the letter.”
“Yes, the Bartowski Letter. Like I said, it came to the museum in 2381. However, a little over a week ago, a Companion came to the museum and said she’d found the person it belonged to… so, I gave her the letter and she took off with it.”
“Companion?” asked Bryce. “Exactly what is a Companion?”
“And how exactly did she talk this letter out of you?” Sarah asked.
“A Companion is a space whore,” the curator replied crassly. “And how do you think she got the letter?”
Sarah arched her eyebrows in disbelief and was about to say something, when Casey cut her off.
“What was her name?” he asked.
“Inara… uh, Inara… hmm… I’ve forgotten her last name. It starts with a C or an S or something. You can find her if you go to the Companions Guild, though.”
“Then we’ll do that,” Sarah stated. “Where do we find the Companions Guild?”
“Their headquarters are on the planet Sihnon. It’s impossible to miss – it’s impossible to miss – it’s one of the grandest structures ever built.”
“And how far away is Sihnon?” Casey asked.
“Oh, it’s about two weeks travel. Not bad at all.”
that same time
transport Serenity
Chuck walked into the cargo bay, pulling the keys to the Herder out of his pocket as he did so. He noticed that what was left of the windshield had been pulled out of its frame, but otherwise, it wasn’t in bad shape – at least, cosmetically.
Then he noticed something else. The front end of the Herder was up on jacks, and… “That’s a pretty nice looking set of legs sticking out from under my car!” he said.
Kaylee slid out from underneath the Herder. Her hair was messy, and she had grease on her face and hands, but she still lit up with a huge smile when she saw Chuck. “Hi there!” she said.
“So what’s the prognosis on the Herder?” he asked.
“Well, your torque converter is pretty much toast, but aside from that, your transmission’s shiny.”
“Okay, what is it with that word?” Chuck asked. “That’s the second time I’ve heard you use ‘shiny’.”
“Well, if something’s good, but it’s better than good, that’s what we say. Why, what would you say?”
“Well,” Chuck replied, “I’d probably use ‘awesome’ or ‘great’. I’d use ‘shiny’ to describe something that had been polished and reflected a lot of light.”
“Interesting,” she said, mulling it over. “Well, anyway, I can definitely fix up the torque converter. If we can get a new piece of glass for the windshield, it’ll be good as new!”
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Chuck said. “This particular Herder has been crushed by a truck, had its door and driver’s seat blown off, and almost used to blow up a pier in Los Angeles.”
“Wow…” Kaylee said. “This little car has had quite the history, hasn’t it?”
“Oh, you better believe it,” Chuck proclaimed. “It’s the Herder that won’t die.”
“Shi- uh, awesome,” Kaylee said, trying it out. “So, what brings you down here?”
“I just needed to get something out of the Herder,” Chuck said. He pressed the tailgate button on the remote and popped it open as he approached the Herder. Opening the floor compartment, he pulled out his tool kit and a handful of zip ties.
He turned around, and discovered that Kaylee had snuck up behind him while he was getting his tools. She pulled him to her, and kissed him hungrily. He responded in kind, and dropped his tool kit and zip ties on the floor. He was about to pull Kaylee into the back of the Herder when there was a whistle from up above.
Chuck stopped and looked up to see Jayne Cobb leering at them from the catwalk. “Aw, come on, don’t stop on my account!” Jayne complained.
Chuck looked at Kaylee, smiled, and shook his head. “I’m sure we’ll continue this discussion another time,” he said.
Kaylee smiled back, and without a word, lay down on her roller and slid back under the Herder.
1:02 P.M.
January 2nd, 2519
Eavesdown Docks
Lorenz and Tweedum heard the Trans Am before they saw it. The unmistakable sounds of squealing tires and a Chevy 350 small-block V8 echoed across the airfield, so they were completely unsurprised when Agent Walker power-slid the car to a stop in a cloud of dust..
“THAT’S IT!” shouted Bryce Larkin, as he popped out of the car. “You are NOT touching my car again, you crazy bi-“
“I wouldn’t,” Casey interrupted him. “She’s liable to shoot you.”
“Two weeks. TWO FUCKING WEEKS,” Sarah fumed as she stormed up the stairway into the Enterprise.
Lorenz looked at Casey. “The hell?”
“Is the shuttle ready to go?” Casey asked.
“Yeah, the heat shield’s fixed up, and we’ve got enough provisions on board for about a month… what was Agent Walker going on about with the whole ‘two weeks’ bit?”
“We have to go to a planet called Sihnon,” Casey said to Lorenz. “It’s in the computer that Captain Yagosian gave us. It’s about two weeks’ flight.”
“Ah,” Lorenz said. “Well. We’re gonna get to know each other real well, aren’t we.”
“The fun never ends,” Bryce said sarcastically. “We’ll get the Trans Am loaded up if you’ll get pre-flight started. We should probably get going before Sarah blows a blood vessel.”
“Right,” Major Lorenz said. “Well, let’s get going.”
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